Listening to: Angel -
Aerosmith
Mood: Optimistic
Thanks to our moving half way around the globe, our
daughters had almost a full year without any institutionalized schooling. There were many successful and even more unsuccessful
attempts to teach them things at home too. All in all, it has been a LOT of
togetherness time for the girls and me. I both love it and get tired of it.
The time has come for them to once again hop on board the
white and green school bus (we don’t have yellow ones here) and leave for the
day. Well, at least my oldest will leave for the day, the youngest will only be
gone a half day. This was recent and largely unwelcome news for me. Not only
was my first in school all day by this age, I really feel like my younger one
could do with some independent time from me and her sister so she can make her
own friends and develop her own personality.
There has been much talk lately about whether or not I
should get a job when the kids are in school full time and if that job should
be me starting a business. I was generally very excited about this new phase of
life. Having my youngest in school only half time pretty much curtails that all
together. Between finding a job, transportation, care for them after school,
there really isn’t much sense to be had out of this.
My eldest daughter spent last night fretting and repeating
that she was scared. Her first 3 months in an Indian school were indeed rough
for her, but she made friends and did fine in school. I reminded her gently,
but she will still have to see for herself that she can do it and will be fine.
My youngest is also apprehensive, but I think it’s more to
do with the stories her sister told her than anything else. It’s probably
intimidating for her to have to go to her own classroom also. My girls usually
are found together. They are sisters after all.
I have a 1 week reprieve before I have to put the youngest
on the bus also as the younger ones start 1 week later. I’m not a crier. I won’t
get emotional watching them both get on the bus. But I know the house will be
very empty, and very, very quiet. I look forward to having a small chunk of
time for myself for the first time in almost 8 years, yet I still worry that
things will be hard for them. Will they enjoy their class? Will the teacher be
nice? Will my youngest get lost in the school? I know these are all silly
worries and that the girls will be fine, but it’s still hard not to worry.
Their time as babies is over. It’s both exhilarating to see
them grow and thrive and heartbreaking that I will never hold their warm,
squishy little bald heads up under my chin as I rock them to sleep.
My apologies for getting a bit maudlin here at the end. I keep waiting for it to get easier that they are growing up, but it never does.
Becky
No comments:
Post a Comment